Any blood left?

It is recommended that women with POF use HRT - hormone replacement therapy -  as a way to replace the hormones we are missing (estrogen for, among other things, bone health; progesterone to have a monthly bleed for, among other things, uterine health). I was placed on an estrogen patch and oral progesterone, but after 7 months we (me, DH, my therapist) finally realized that the form of progesterone I was on was actually causing my depression to get worse. I realized this because my anti-depressants were finally working but there seemed to be a cycle - 2 weeks I was fine, 2 weeks (when taking progesterone) I felt like I was going out of my mind, 2 weeks fine, and so on.... I felt like I was Jekyll and Hyde! My endo switched my progesterone which helped. However, at my follow-up appointment to make sure this other med was working, my endo was concerned with consistently high estrogen and white cell count.

Thus marked the beginning of 2 months of hell. I went of my HRT for 6 weeks of weekly blood work. Every single POF symptom came back in force, and I swear the only way I kept my sanity was from my anti-depressant. I cried more in front of my DH, the saint, during these 6 weeks than during the 15 years previous we have known each other (DH actually liked seeing me like that, he said it gave him a chance to be the strong one!). The results? Well, my hormones were still doing funky things, but my white cell count continued to stay high.  I was referred to hematology, which at first wanted to do a bone marrow biopsy (freak out!!!!!), but luckily they decided on *more* blood work.

The outcome? Well, blood work is done. I have been back on my HRT for 3 weeks now and am starting to feel normal again (whatever that means). I just heard from my endo that she has the results from hematology - genetic testing was negative, which means no cancer concern (yeah!), and no auto-immune or inflammatory issues (yeah!) either. I need to have my white blood count checked every 6 months to monitor it. So, good news that nothing else is going on; I just might have high white cell count, and it could mean that that is just my normal. Who knows - I always knew I was abnormal.

I am just glad the waiting for test results is over; nerve racking! And, I'm sooo glad to have my estrogen patch back; I felt like a nicotine addict just given a box of nicotine patches - I wanted to plaster them all over my body!